Thursday, November 20, 2008

TeacherSense (or, A Day In The Life of a Primary School Teacher)

(Tune: The WIlliam Tell Overture)

You really have to see the original upon which this particular masterpiece is based. Go to Youtube! Look up "Momsense" by Anita Renfroe! Enjoy!

TeacherSense, or A Day In The Life Of A Primary School Teacher

Woke up late, woke up late, woke up late today
Rushed around, stubbed my toe, oh what can I say?
Spilled my drink, stopped to think, took some time to pray
Got to school and was on time today

Supervise, supervise, gotta watch the kids
Find the stuff, say hello, find the one who hid
Fix the book, heal the scrape, is it just THursday?
What? You're sick?! I didn't ask for this.

Come on in, sit on down it's time to read our story and listen to me
What is happening to you that makes you act as if you're only three?
Yes I know a bear attacked a man and I know about the plane that crashed
I am sure that in here we're safe and I'm sorry that your toy is smashed

Let's work now, let's think now, please stay on task..I'm begging you
Today it is Thursday, and yes, one plus one is two

Recess time, recess time, recess time is here
Rain is bad, you won't melt, no, lunch is not near.
Let's go out, let's go play, line up nice and straight
Wear your coat because it's cold today.

Play outside, Don't play rough, Would you just play fair?
Be polite, Make a friend, Don't forget to share
Work it out, Wait your turn, Never take a dare
Get along, Don't make me come out there

Sit in your chair, get off that chair
Don't sit so close, you're too loud, your inside voice is needed!
Yes, we are going to read out loud
Don't interrupt, it's your turn, let's clean up now for lunch!

Where you going and with whom and why are you not sitting in your chair?
Saying thank you, please, excuse me are good manners you'll need everywhere.
You'll appreciate my wisdom next year when your teacher is so pleased
Can't wait 'til they get to deal with the way you act when you are teased!

You'll thank me for the counsel I gave you so willingly
But right now I thank you NOT to roll your eyes at me

Close your mouth when you chew, Would appreciate
Take a bite, Maybe two, Of the stuff you hate
Use your fork, Do not you burp, Or I'll set you straight
Eat the food that's put in your lunchbag

Get an A, Get the door, Don't get smart with me
Get a Grip, Get in here, I'll count to 3
Get a job, Get a life, Get a PhD
Get a dose of...
I don't care who started it! Your recess will be in the office!
Get your story straight, And tell the truth for once for heaven's sake
And if all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you jump too?

If I've said it once, I've said at least a thousand times before that
You're too old to act this way, it must be your parents' DNA
Look at me when I am talking, stand up straight when you walk
A place for everything, and everything must be in place
Stop crying or I'll give you something real to cry about

Let's go home, let's go home, I have work to do
mark the books, clean the room, ack! my grades are due!

Day is done, I am though

And tomorrow we will do this all again because these tasks just never end

You don't need the reason why
I said so
I said so
I said so
I said so
I'm in charge
you're not
you're not
you're not
I'm in charge!


New Song!

Hello to all!

I have here, for your enjoyment, a song I wrote today. Yes, this masterpiece is born of another event occurring at school.

Please think of the song "Christmas Time Is Here" (the one that is sung by Charlie Brown and Company!).

Now that it is in your head, here are the new lyrics.

Head lice time is here
Itchiness and fear
Telephone calls and chemicals
Let's check behind each ear...

Nits are in the hair
Rumours everywhere
Who's the source, and what's the course
of treatment? Please Beware!

Move the coats apart...
Don't we all look smart?
Dollar bills and headache pills
it's not my favourite part.

(pun totally intended. If you didn't get it, sorry)

Head lice time is here
Itchiness and fear
Telephone calls and chemicals
Let's check behind each ear...
Telephone calls and chemicals
Let's check behind each ear...

Thank you, thank you very much. Tune in later for "TeacherSense", a day in the life of a primary the form of "MomSense" by Anita Renfroe. If you haven't seen that, you must look it up on Youtube.