Castles In the Air...

New Year's Resolutions...Grades Five and Six

2012-01-04T15:46:00.000-08:00

More funnies from the grade 5 and 6 students! They were assigned (as a time filler after the rest of the Social Studies material for today was covered) a worksheet titled "My New Year's Resolutions" with the task of filling in at least two resolutions in each category on the page. I present to you the highest highlights in each category! Spelling and grammar are unchanged (and yes, I'm shaking my head over some of it, too!).

Resolutions to live a healthier life:
Do not eat candy.
Work out.
Shower a couple times every week.
Do a work out

Resolutions to help my parents:
Sower every day (shower)
Behave and obey
Do better to clean out the house

Resolutions to do well in school:
Right neter
Lern how to spel (hahahhah.....*cough*...hahahha! Same student for both of these so far...)
Don't slack off in my work.
Write neeter
Do my homework at night and not get homework

Resolutions to live a happier life:
Sower more (shower)
eat good
Lose a couple of pounds
Don't argue with my brothers
Get all Pokemon in Pokemon Heart Gold
Play more games
No homework

Resolutions to be good to my friends:
be nice
be good
Help my friends with there problems
Be nicer
go to their birthday

Resolutions to protect the environment:
Don't leter
conseve energe
Don't step on plants. Except for grass.

Resolutions to be a good citizen:
Save power
Help the Citizen in the Town

Life According to Grades 5/6

2012-01-03T15:25:00.000-08:00

Life According to 5/6 Grade Students:

Humour abounds when discussing the “olden days” with kids. Today’s discussion was an introduction to electricity and the role it plays in life. The corresponding assignment required students to think of five electrical appliances, describe their purposes, and then tell what people did before they had electricity. The students took this very seriously...and fortunately I decided to not even glance carefully at the answers until the kids were gone!

Highlights:
(wonky formatting! The responses are in the following pattern:

Appliance
Purpose
What People Did Before Electricity )

Razor

Get rid of facial hair

They didn’t

Toaster

Make toast

Did not make toast

Kettle

Boil water

Didn’t boil water

Microwave

Warm stuff up

Didn’t warm stuff up

Microwave

So you can eat

No way to warm up food

Coffee Maker

Makes coffee

Didn’t make coffee

Internet

Shows funny stuff

They would hunt

Video Games

Play stuff

They built houses

Stereo

Fun

Work

And....my personal favourite...

Shows the world

They probably threw stones

A Crazy Idea...

2011-12-23T11:08:00.000-08:00

I have an idea. It's a bit overwhelming, a bit crazy, and a whole lot of work, but I want to do it.

First Topic:

In my valley (mine! All Mine!) there are 6 small SDA schools within about 250 kilometres of each other...and who interact very little. With one exception, all of the schools are just Elementary/Middle schools, and typically it is only students in older grades who get to be a part of multi-school events. This year I initiated and facilitated The Great Resource Exchange, swapping everything from tables and chairs to textbooks.

New Topic:

In my life I have been blessed to be a part of many choirs who have performed a lot of great music. One choir that stands out was Auntie Nancy's homeschool choir where we performed the Christmas Messiah for Young Voices and the Easter Messiah for Young Voices. I was fortunate enough to be able to direct two different choirs in performing the Christmas Messiah, one in Saipan and one in Kelowna.

Third Topic:

I love directing musicals of all sorts...but am rather sick of the somewhat inane performances that seem to be ubiquitous with elementary schools. So...I thought...

Combining the Topics:

...Let's do an all-school performance of the Messiah! That's right! Let's do a wee bit of editing to combine the Christmas and Easter Messiah for Young Voices (meaning, I'll do it), get all the schools involved (if they're willing), pick a somewhat neutral location (for several of the schools argue and bicker with great regularity), and just go for it!

The Crazy Idea:
Pick several songs that all schools will do as a mass choir (Hallelujah, For Unto Us A Child Is Born, etc), assign a couple of songs for each school to do individually, assign the speaking/reading parts to students from each school, and have at it! Pick a Sabbath, have a group church service/potluck lunch, do a quick dress rehearsal (for the mass choir songs, especially), and perform it Saturday evening for all of the school and church families. Wouldn't that be amazing? It's my plan for next year (2012-2013), in March, hopefully.

It's crazy, it's a bit overwhelming, but it just might work!

Emergency Birthday Gifts

2011-11-23T14:16:00.000-08:00

Today I had an "oops!" moment...of epic proportions. Two of the youngest students have birthdays this week, one yesterday and one today, and I forgot to buy a gift for each of them! I had planned out what I was going to get but forgot to do so. They knew that today was the day to receive the gifts, as I had a music class with them...

So, what was I to do? After a bit of clever word-work (in my opinion) convincing them that they needed to wait until the end of the school day, I came up with a Making Kit.
In each kit (ziploc bag) I put:
rubber bands
scotch tape
electrical tape
a styrofoam ball
a bunch of wooden beads
feathers
paper clips
ornament hooks
popsicle sticks
pipecleaners
a handful of new crayons
a little flower pot (one of those that's not a lot bigger than my thumb)
and a partridge in a pear tree.

Ok, so I left out the partridge. And the tree.

The note that goes along with the kit says "In this package you will find many things for building monsters, machines, vehicles, or whatever you choose!"

This kind of gift would have been a big hit with my group in PH...we'll see how it goes over here!

Oops!

2011-11-14T14:56:00.000-08:00

Here I thought that I'd kept up pretty well with this blog, but then I looked at the "last post" date.

I had my best day of the year last week when I was subbing in for one of the teachers at my school. All day as a classroom teacher in a Grade 1-4 class. A few more days, or even part days, like that, and I might survive this job! Yes, subbing in is different, but she'd left me a very minimal plan for the day (after we'd discussed and agreed on it...not as a nasty surprise!), and I was able to just be the teacher rather than the sub. It was a beautiful thing.

Next year, between a likely downsizing of the school staff, a maternity leave for one of the teachers, and my own preference for being in a classroom, I may be able to be a classroom teacher again, with only a bit of my time being "administration". Does it make me a complete sucker for punishment that I'm praying it happens that way?

You Know It's Monday When...

2011-09-26T09:34:00.001-07:00

...you have to log into your own online class as a student, unable to grant speaking/writing privileges to anyone at all...with the user name "Ms. Gerber Can't Get Online. No Class. Check Your Email."

Dear Week...

2011-09-22T14:58:00.000-07:00

Dear Week,

For future reference, late nights + early morning + meetings + many unrelated but stressful events = nasty.

Week, you are killing me!

Is it Friday yet?

Sincerely,

Shannon

Seven Things...

2011-09-20T14:13:00.000-07:00

As I don't know how to properly insert a link to a set of blogs...I'm just not cool like that...I've just copied and pasted the badge...and am taking Michaele Sommerville's (http://kidney-garden.blogspot.com ) request/meme to heart! Thanks, Michaele!

Here are seven things you may not know about me.

1. I read Nora Roberts and JD Robb books voraciously...and have been known to hide them behind a layer of more academic texts on my bookcases when the need arises.

2. I have become hooked on Pinterest, and could spend hours finding exciting projects for which I am never likely to find the time.

3. I love to quilt, and have at least 4 projects on the go at the moment.

4. I remember my dreams vividly, most of the time.

5. I am fascinated by anthropology (especially archaeology), and if I ever get the chance to upgrade my anthropology minor, it will be in that field!

6. I actually do regret the year that I spent in the mission field. It was a terrible year. There were wonderful parts to it, but overall it was not a good experience. Does that make me a bad person?

7. I spend more time planning on a weekly basis for my approximately three hours of teaching each day than I did all of last year when I was teaching full time and not doing any administrative work.

So now, to those of you reading this blog, it's your turn!

Justin Bieber...Rowan Atkinson...The Nylons...Restful Sleep

2011-09-20T08:06:00.000-07:00

Three of these things belong together.
Three of these things are kind of the same.
One of these things just doesn't belong here.
Now it's time to play our game...time to play our game!

What do three of these things have in common? How are three of these things kind of the same?

I woke up this morning remembering vivid dreams of being at an entire Justin Bieber concernt. Yes, I remember the entire thing. Don't remember any songs, just teeny-bopper screaming from the adults in the audience.

The concert was at a church. Yep.

Rowan Atkinson, as Mr. Bean, was the opening act and intermission entertainment.

Justin Bieber got put in the "time out" chairs for being too rowdy during Mr. Bean's performance.

Yes, that's right. Time Out chairs, in a church, at a Justin Bieber concert.

The concert ended with the entire audience (again, mostly adults) spontaneously bursting out into a very excellent rendition of "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" by The Nylons.

I also dreamed a long dream involving running away (well, driving away) from people who were out to murder all of the dolls that were in my car. ??????????

This doesn't bode well for lasting through a long day...at the school from 7:00am-9:00pm...

You can't make this stuff up.

Good Morning, World...

2011-09-09T09:13:00.000-07:00

As one of my former students says: "Good Morning, World, and all of it's inhabitants...I'm ready!"

While I may or may not be "ready", things are going well! I miss having my own class, but am enjoying teaching a wider variety of things. Next week marks the beginning of my distance learning classes, which will mean that I am teaching students from Grade One to Grade Six online, over the phone, and in the classroom. Woohoo!

The First "Real" Day...

2011-09-07T14:02:00.000-07:00

Today I got to spend a couple of hours teaching, and now think that I'll survive the year. These Science, Socials, and Music classes are going to be AWESOME, even if I lose sleep with the prep! Next week is when the Distance Learning part of my job will kick in, and that will be great, too. More Science and Socials!

Now, I just need to find the right books to read to my fifth and sixth grade Science/Socials class. We're learning in Socials about being good Global Citizens, and what it means to be a "Global Citizen", so I'm thinking books about children living in different parts of the world. But, not boring books...excellent books, which I will enjoy, too! For this curriculum the books need to be mostly current, rather than historical. I sense a trip to Chapters in my future! Criteria: suitable for 10-12 year olds, acceptable by conservative Christian standards, not used in the Language Arts program, exciting rather than boring...

At a loss...

2011-09-06T09:37:00.000-07:00

It's the first day of school!

I don't have a class of students. It feels so strange to be listening to the noise of introductions and learning, and to not be directly involved. It's actually very hard. I knew that this would be a huge challenge, and I know that I will enjoy the teaching that I will be doing, but not having my own class to introduce to routines, procedures, and the classroom just really stinks.

That was easy!

2011-09-02T08:19:00.000-07:00

Last week I read a post on one of the blogs that I follow (http://missbrave.blogspot.com/2011/08/staples-not-in-fact-all-that-easy.html), and was both amused and saddened by the author's experience at Staples.
I love Staples. It is one of those places that just makes me happy. However, I have also felt the "shame" of not donating to whatever school supply drive is going on. 99% of the time the "shame" comes despite the fact that I KNOW how much of my own money I spend on things for students! Then, yesterday, this happened.

I stopped in at my local store so that I could buy all sorts of things (though without a list as comprehensive as when I taught in a PH and had to take supplies for all of my students with me), and was irritated to hear a long spiel being given to every other customer. NOT that I think that the school supplies drive was a bad thing, or that they SHOULDN'T be asking for donations, but because I was dreading being asked.

I got to the register, emptied my cart, and pulled out my teacher identification so that I could get my 15% teacher appreciation discount (Yay for the last discount day!)...and she didn't even ask. No spiel, no guilt, no assumptions. Whether she refrained because she saw what I was buying, because of the identification, or because she was just sick of asking people, it doesn't matter!

Kudos to the cashier at register 1.

If I had a magic wand...

2011-09-01T11:18:00.000-07:00

If I had a magic wand, I would...

...clear out all of the junk in my new classroom with a swish-and-flick.
...make people answer phone calls, or, at least, return them!
...finish sorting and unpacking all of the clothes in my apartment.
...make new students appear out of the woodwork.
...create a paperwork system which fills out and files itself.
...add four "sleep hours" to the day. Not work hours, sleep hours.
...have a self-filling and self-warming coffee cup.

What would you do with your magic wand?

From the Principal's Chair...

2011-08-29T18:51:00.000-07:00

Life really does look different from the other side of the "big desk"...the paperwork, the troubleshooting, the being-the-one-who-has-to-be-responsible. I'm really enjoying it...but at the same time I am bemoaning the fact that, while Being Principal is only 1/3 of my job, it is eating up all of my time so far. This is the list of things I'd rather be getting accomplished because they have to be done before school and they are more fun than phone calls:

1. Clearing out my new classroom.
2. Setting up my new classroom.
3. Decorating my new classroom.
4. Creating hallway bulletin boards.
5. Getting my course outlines finished.
6. Contacting the families of my distance education students (Grades 3-5, fun stuff!).
7. Finishing setting up my new apartment.
8. Making the office look less ugly (as I described to my Mom...finding art/decor which works with, yet doesn't clash with, the ugly!).

As you can tell by numbers 1 and 5, the office work is getting really old.

That said, school starts in one week! Bring it on! Just...not yet.

Could it be?

2011-08-24T10:17:00.000-07:00

Could life really be beginning to settle into some semblance of normality?

Here I go: new community, new jobs, new apartment...according to the Holmes and Rahe stress test, I currently rank a 329...which is high. Very high. Not as high as some, but very high. And yet, it seems like things might be calming down.

Highs:
1. My new administrative job still includes classroom teaching. Bonus!
2. My new community is only an hour away from my family, not 12 hours and a ferry ride.
3. I now live in an area where there is shopping! Hockey! Staples! Starbucks!!! Chapters!!!
4. I will be working with people who I already know that I'll work well with.
5. The cost of a lot of stuff is lower, and I don't have to travel 4.5 hours to buy a pair of shoes.

Lows:
1. My job is all over the place (not physically all over the place, but still). I will be working about 1/3 of the time as a principal, 1/3 as a classroom teacher, and 1/3 as a distance learning instructor. Can anyone say balancing act?
2. Rent is a heck of a lot higher.
3. Because of my job, and the fact that it is a Christian school, I am now part of three major boards/committees...meaning that I have meetings almost every Tuesday night (threeTuesdays each month). I hate meetings.

But here's the good news, blog wise...being that I'll be in the office more, I should have more of a chance to keep this thing updated!

"Why I'm Not Going to French Today"

2011-05-25T12:55:00.000-07:00

Today's laugh is a long one...brought to you courtesy of a small girl who didn't want to go to French. My response to her insistence on this point was "If you aren't going to French, you have to write a letter to the French teacher explaining your reason. It has to be six pages long, because you are six years old." It sounds harsh, I know, and the other students chose going to French over this "torture"...but this little one took me up on it. She did convince me, however, that six pages was long enough that I needed to write her words down for her. I was practically shaking as I tried to contain my giggles. The letter is, as follows, exactly as it was dictated to me.

"Dear Mrs. Wood,
I've learned enough for awhile and so I am going to skip French, but I'll do it next French day.

And, I will try my ardest and listen as good as I can.

But, some of my work might not be as good as you think, so I will try my hardest.

I will do what you say and I will try my hardest to do that. If you give me a treat if I'm very good I will not take it. I will give it to someone who's very very bad at their work because I'm a nice person.

Because they will be nice to me because I was nice to them, but they might not. If they are not nice to me still I will treat them even better so they might do it.

If they still aren't nice, I will still treat them nicely and maybe one day they will be nice to me. So, that is why I'm not going to French.

O."

I'm sending a copy home with her Mom. This deserves to be saved!

Life Changes!

2011-04-21T09:31:00.000-07:00

Sometimes life happens and it changes the game plan. For me, part this change involves resigning my position at my current school effective the end of this year, moving back home, and hoping/praying/applying for a new job for September! Uncertainty stinks, but so does being isolated and alone. Fortunately, I have the option of going back home to a supportive situation!

On another note, we've been very in the classroom! Stay tuned this long weekend for a photo tour of the past couple of months in Kindergarten/Grade One!

Spring Break Blues

2011-03-27T19:57:00.000-07:00

Specifically, I have the "Spring Break is OVER" blues! I spent the last week having wonderful visits with family, geocaching, and doing just enough shopping to drain the budget...but the holiday just wasn't long enough. I'm finally feeling ready to spend time planning the next few months in more detail...however, school resumes tomorrow.

This evening's mental debate makes me realize that I need a little more time off. It went, as follows (regular text is the first voice and italics indicate the more rational voice in my head):

"I'm hungry. I want tart shells.

I can't eat just plain tart shells.

Ok, so I'll make tarts.

I don't have what I need for tarts. Except for shells.

Ok, so I need to think of something else to put it the shells. I want hot dogs in them.

SERIOUSLY?!?

Ok, that would be foolish. I'll make vegetable soup and put that in the shells. With hot dogs.

Soup is too thin.

I'll thicken the soup. Oooh, I want cheese, too. I'll put that on top of the soup, in the tart shells. It will be like shepherd's pie.

In tart shells.

*soup tarts go in the oven*

I'm not hungry anymore.

*sigh*"

Valentines and 100th Day and Monkeys...oh my!

2011-02-18T19:29:00.000-08:00

I knew that I was in for quite the week rather early in the school year when I discovered that Valentine's Day and the 100th Day of School would fall in the same week. Then add in an enormous (for PH) snowfall, a school-wide skating afternoon, and the week felt like a non-stop party (Also known as draining. Very draining.).

However, parties and party events can lead to excellent learning opportunities!

Decorating for Valentine's Day allows us to talk about symmetry and balance...

...and to learn about balanced diets (and eating the healthy stuff first!).

The 100th day of school...

...allowed us to count out 100 books, figure out how many each student should carry to the gym to make the loads fair, and to stack them up to see how high the pile was...

...before laying them out end-to-end to see how long the line was!

It stretched across the gym then almost all the way back again.

Streamers, of course, make everything more fun! Unfortunately, all of my balloon fun pictures, and images of other activities, have the students featuring prominently. Great for their parents, but not for my blog. :)

Then there was Curious George. We watched the movie over the course of the week (about 25 minutes each afternoon Monday-Thursday) to replace our Rest Time, and loved it completely! It was absolutely darling, the music was great, and appealed to the all of the children...and to their teacher! We've been reading Curious George stories, so watching the movie was a logical choice this week.

Not surprisingly, the students wanted to paint all over the walls like George did! While this wasn't possible, we did have a blast on Friday painting all over the floor! We measured off equal sections of the big drop cloth (more math!) which usually goes underneath our tables during art projects, poured out the paints (lessons in colour blending!)...

...and went wild! You'll notice that a couple of the students wanted to work together, hence the double-sized section. This activity also provided a lesson in natural consequences. We practiced (without paint!) how to start at the top of the section and then work down, to avoid kneeling on the paint, before getting down to the art. They all mastered this, though one sock got some paint marks...not bad! We also tested to see how thickly we could glop paint before it started to leak through to the carpet! The results of that will not be known until I go to the school on Sunday.

Our finished masterpieces included everything from trucks and coconut trees...to monkeys and robots!

Of course, Curious George was a very important part of the finished product!

This activity was a great example of Teacher as Facilitator...and of interest-led learning! I had nothing to do with the art or ideas, and everything to do with running around madly changing paint water, getting more paint, replacing paper towels, washing brushes, and generally trying to keep things clean. Did I have "paint big scenes on the floor" in my lesson plans for the day? No, I sure didn't. I don't know if I would have ever even dreamed of taping down a big canvas and letting them go at it. It's a lesson that I definitely plan to repeat!

Funny!

2011-02-04T18:38:00.000-08:00

Top Grade One Moment of the Day...while the students were playing with Playmobil and setting up a forest camp:

R, a very entertaining and precocious little girl, said, "The men need to go off hunting and the women need to stay and set up the camp."

When I questioned the reason for the traditional roles (not criticizing, just questioning), I was told that it was "because the women actually know what needs to be done!"

How do you argue with that?

Mrs. G: Getting the Point Across

2011-01-22T17:31:00.000-08:00

A post from my Mom's blog...you may recognize the premise of this assembly activity from an email which has circulated...but seeing it done has SO much more impact! I couldn't be prouder of Steve...and don't think that it could have worked any better if they'd scripted the student responses (which they didn't).

Mrs. G: Getting the Point Across: "I have been thinking about what things are important to me as a teacher for quite some time. Leading up to the start of school in September ..."

A Voice from....a fish?

2011-01-22T17:17:00.000-08:00

Out of the mouths of babes...

Yesterday, during a Bible trivia game for our school's assembly, two of my little darlings had the opportunity to answer a question. They had to fill in the blanks of a Bible verse (I don't remember which one), which talked about "a voice from ______" (Matthew 3:17?). The first small one, on my team, said "God!", which was the wrong answer...but was a good guess. The second small one, on the opposing team, answered by saying...wait for it..."a fish!"

I am very proud of myself. I hid my hysterical laughter.

I am very proud of the rest of the students in the school. They only giggled quietly.

I am very proud of the little student, who was trying so hard to participate and be a part of the assembly...even if her answer was "a fish!"

The answer, by the way, was "heaven."

Babies

2011-01-14T11:18:00.000-08:00

Good Gravy! What to say?
Three different center time conversations are going on right now...
The first group is talking about making babies, and how the mom in their game got a fever and died.
The second group is talking about changing each other's "diapers".
The third group was overheard saying to the "mommy" in their game...wait for it..."good night Mrs. Slappy Boobs".

I'm ignoring, I'm ignoring, I'm ignoring...

Oh, what a day...

2011-01-11T18:35:00.000-08:00

You know it's been quite a day when two of your darling students run away from you...in full sight and hearing of a police officer.

They got quite a lecture upon returning (this was right outside the school...not like they could go anywhere) about how SHAMEFUL it was to behave that way and WHAT did it make them LOOK like for the police officer to SEE them behaving SO BADLY...and how EMBARRASSING it was for them (I left out how embarrassing it was for me) to be known as the boys who RAN AWAY from their TEACHER in front of a POLICE MAN...and that they were SO LUCKY that I didn't take them out for a time out IN the police car.

They were very repentant.

One of the mothers told me that I should have "scared the snot out of them" by marching them out for a talk with the police officer about safety, responsibility, and obedience. I really should have. :)

The Week of the Christmas Concert

2010-12-13T20:39:00.000-08:00

Twas the week of the Christmas Concert and all through the school
Not a student was obeying a single school rule.
The little ones were fussing, the big ones were rude...
the teachers were grumpy, and, yes, fussing, too.

The schedules were changing again every minute,
you never quite knew how the others would spin it!

The practices, how endless! The lines were so wrong!
The students had seemed to forget every song.
Then I, with my whistle, and evil glare of death,
while avoiding a tantrum and taking a deep breath...

LOST IT!

"SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET! DON'T BE SO DARN MEAN!
I TOLD YOU TO LISTEN, YES I AM THE QUEEN!
NO, you CAN'T use the bathroom, you CAN'T get a drink...
I DON'T want to hear it, please, let me THINK!"

Then, what to my angry blue eyes did appear?
A cat, in a hat, with a box, and a beard?

No, not a cat, nor a hat, box, or beard...
...just another dear friend who was acting quite weird!
The students were awestruck, but still acted absurd,
while I hoped and prayed that my tantrum wasn't heard!

And later this day, what could happen next?
I encountered a teacher, who was really quite vexed.
My students, you see, had not behaved well,
in French class you'd think they'd been under a spell!

They clucked and they snored, while supposed to be singing
their French song, MUSIC, was supposed to be ringing.
One little "angel", smacked her head on the table...
...over and over for as long as she was able.

The French teacher growled as only French teachers do,
while out in the hallway I heard something new.

"Drop and do push-ups!" A teacher did cry,
so I peeked 'round the corner in order to spy.
Her students, how naughty, her patience was gone.
Alas, it was thus through the school since dawn.

So what might come next? What atrocities wait?
What new evil could befall on tomorrow's date?
We wait and we wonder, while hitting our heads...
...perhaps all the teachers should be put onto meds.

Spiders and Seventh Grade

2010-12-09T20:48:00.000-08:00

It's not very often that I give over this blog to the "Big Kids" at my school...the seventh and eighth graders who have a music class with me once a week. However, today is one of those days! At the time it was rather embarrassing...but now it's just hilarious!

To set the scene:

Music Class. End of the Day. Practicing for the Christmas Concert.

Seventh Grade Girl, a Drama Queen by nature, keeps jumping out of her chair, squealing. Over and over again.

What does a teacher do? Get frustrated! And, of course, try to find out what is going on. She informs me of the following offense. The seventh grade boy beside her keeps dangling a spider right in front of her. I tell him to knock it off, tell her to calm down, we carry on.

Only, it doesn't end. She keeps right on squealing and jumping. Frankly, I've had enough. I march over to the boy, fully believing that he is just teasing her, and that there isn't a spider. I extend my hand and insist that he give me whatever it is that he has. The whole class freezes. What will happen?

He opens his hand and drops the item onto my palm. I look down and scream, tossing the offending item, a brown spider, as far as I can, then order him to "go get it and GET RID OF IT!"

He starts to laugh. And laugh. And laugh some more. The child could hardly breathe as he walked over, picked up the spider...and begins to unravel it. Yes, the spider was nothing more than some brown thread, tangled and crumpled to resemble a spider.

The class erupts. Chaos ensues. Even the "good kids" are just DYING! I, too, begin to laugh. What else could I do?

Fortunately, the class was nearly over. Fifteen minutes of giggles and requests to "do it again, Miss Gerber, in SLOW MOTION!" with helpful reminders of exactly what I had looked and sounded like was quite enough.

But truly, if I'd thought of it and had thought that I could pull it off? *sigh*

Ahhhh...the power of suggestion. And spiders. And Seventh Grade Boys.

Report Cards...

2010-12-06T18:27:00.001-08:00

Number One Reason for having fewer grades in a classroom...fewer different report cards to deal with!

Funniest Kindergarten Moment!

2010-11-29T17:36:00.001-08:00

Said during a discussion about angels, and how they are always with us:

"I think our angels must laugh their heads off at how silly we are sometimes."

Yes, child, I think they must.

Funniest Kindergarten Moment!

2010-11-25T19:36:00.000-08:00

Funniest Kindergarten moment of the day...
Me: "What does this letter say?"
Student: "That's an H."
Me: "What sound does it make?"
Student: "It's like Horse."
Me: "Yes, Horse starts with H. What sound does it make?"
Student: "Neeee-iii-ggg-hhh. HAHAHAHAHHA"

*Student falls off of his chair in hysterics. So does the rest of the class.*

I nearly died laughing.

Rice Flour Cookies

2010-11-21T18:59:00.000-08:00

Student Opinions: "Yum!" "Much better!" "I like this!"
My Opinion: "Yick. Grainy. Aftertaste. So not worth my time."

Experiment Result: I discovered that it's yucky to try new things without all of the proper ingredients (ie, a full mix of different kinds of wheat-free flour). I also rediscovered that I'm very very very grateful to not have food allergies of my own. Real ingredients make a massive difference!

Allergies, Part Two

2010-11-18T19:47:00.000-08:00

So, we tried our cookies today. The dough was passable, but the cookies never really hardened enough in the freezer to be edible. That means (to the students' great excitement!) that we'll try another "experiment" tomorrow. It will involve rice flour (instead of the oat bran) and brown sugar (instead of the white sugar). We'll see! The dough should be stiffer, which will help. I'll let you know!

Allergies, Politics, and Staff Meetings...

2010-11-17T21:45:00.000-08:00

It's sad when a person has a wonderful day, which is then spoiled by the politics of staff meetings. What a way to spoil a day!

Then, how about adding a last minute cookie baking requirement to my Thursday? I actually knew it was a possibility, but was admittedly ignoring it. There is something really intimidating about the following scenario:
--make cookies with your class. Your students have the following restrictions: wheat-free, egg-free, dairy-free, peanut-free, no candy, no artificially coloured/flavoured ingredients. Oh yes, one student hates chocolate. Really, really hates it. The kitchen is unavailable. PS--you have no brown sugar, the store is closed, there isn't a chance to hit the only grocery store in town after it opens tomorrow.

Seriously?!?! This is not some random optional challenge, either! The cookie-making is part of School Spirit Week, and was just a victim of unfortunate timing when it comes to kitchen availability. The allergies/food restrictions are a very real part of my every day reality.

So, this is the plan. I've got a recipe for Frozen Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Balls. These are the listed ingredients: butter, brown sugar, vanilla, water, flour, chocolate chips. These are the ingredients that we are going to experiment with tomorrow: margarine, white sugar, vanilla, water, oat bran (I don't have any oat flour, of course), and chocolate chips (which the chocolate-hater can skip!). If I broach the idea as an experiment, a science project, the kids will love it. Using margarine will eliminate the need to soften the butter. I'll take my own mixer, and will fight for/beg for/borrow/steal freezer space. We'll make them early in the day...so that if it all falls apart I can call in reinforcements (aka: Soy Boy's mother to bring in a wheat-free, dairy-free, egg-free, peanut-free treat!).

If they turn out, I will share the recipe tomorrow!

School Spirit Week

2010-11-16T16:31:00.000-08:00

I love School Spirit Week. Granted, much instructional time is "lost" due to the changes to the schedule, but it's worth it! Yesterday was "Stuffy Day", where each student could bring a favourite stuffy or two to school. We had to do full-on introductions for each visitor to our classroom, of course! Today was "Pajama Day"...which was awesome. The kids were darling and oh-so-comfy. One little one wore a fuzzy polka-dotted pair of footed pajamas...and looked so very very little! Another commented that "this is the most comfortable that I've EVER felt at school!" I enjoyed it as well. Sweatpants, t-shirt, and fuzzy slippers are so much easier when sitting on the floor! Dress clothes? What dress clothes?
Tomorrow is Skating Day...bound to be awesome...and amusing.

Sesame Songs!

2010-11-14T20:07:00.000-08:00

In the spirit of being happy that the long weekend was so awesome, sad that tomorrow is Monday, and yet happy to be back with the kids...a medley of Sesame Songs, to match my mixed up mood! I couldn't narrow my choices down very well...so pick one at random and see if it doesn't make you smile!

Remembrance Day

2010-11-10T20:41:00.000-08:00

Every year I am saddened by the declining health of our veterans. We had a special Remembrance Day ceremony this week, and had a local veteran come and talk to the students. Amidst all of the expected talk of war and guns (popular conversations, of course!) I really appreciated the way that this lovely gentleman emphasized that most veterans are "pro-peace, not pro-war." That's what we needed to hear! That's the focus I try to give for my students.

These veterans are getting old. They're getting sick. They're not around anymore. I haven't checked this statistic for myself, but according to our guest the WWII veterans are dying at a rate of about 2000 each month. Even if his number is exaggerated, it's sad.

Despite this, I am so pleased by the responses of my students to our Remembrance Day discussions. They gave me such gems as this:

"The soldiers are like the Mommy at the end of Love You Forever...we have to finish the song for them."

What an amazing connection for a little one to make!

The Long Day is Over...

2010-11-09T18:09:00.000-08:00

Today served as a good reminder for me...a reminder that two grades is easy, three grades isn't so very bad, but four grades is miserable. Our Grade 2-3 teacher was unable to teach today and her students joined my class. This still kept me well under the provincial classroom cap, but felt like easily twice as many kids as there actually were! It was really nice, actually, to see how my students from last year had progressed. The kids were all (K-3 inclusive) remarkably well behaved, especially seeing as everything was different with the addition of the second class. However, I have come to the following conclusions:

1. The amount of energy required to keep on top of all potential behavioural conflicts in this group needed twice as much coffee as I'd had this morning.
2. If I ever have to run a big grade spread again, I will ensure that I spend the extra kazillion or so hours to match up all of the curriculum and units of study (as much as possible) so that I'm not having to teach four entirely different curricula to the four grades. Differentiated levels within the units, absolutely. That said, my provincial curriculum just doesn't lend well to blended classrooms of more than two grades (in specific combinations).
3. A ration of 3-1 in the boys-girls category is just not fun.
4. It is especially important for teachers of many grades to get a break at some point in the day...at least for five or six minutes! The more grades you have, the more crucial it is to use absolutely every minute productively.
5. Finally, I am so glad that I had the opportunity to really hammer in the importance of being able to sit still for increasing periods of time in order to do seatwork/read stories, from a very early age. It made all the difference in the world today that all of the students were capable of working mostly independently so that I could work with other grades. (Granted, I don't have a tendency to plan very much "sit still and work quietly" time through the day. It is important, but active learning is so much more effective.)

So, now that I have crashed on my couch for the rest of the evening, I'll leave you with one of my favourite Norah Jones songs!

Holidays...

2010-11-08T21:36:00.000-08:00

I will freely admit that I love long weekends. Don't get me wrong, I love my students, I love teaching, and I usually don't mind the interactions with other adults...but I love long weekends! This is a three day teaching week, as Thursday is Remembrance Day (a school holiday) and Friday is a Non-Instructional Day. When you live here, that's code for "work your butt off at the beginning of the week so that you can go downisland (one word, in these parts) and shop/visit people/schedule medical appointments/stop at Costco/go to concerts/catch a hockey game/stop at Starbucks without feeling guilty". Professional Development days (all three) are ok, but Non-Instructional Days (again, three) are gold! Everyone understands that students, parents and teachers alike need to get to a bigger center! This weekend I'll be meeting up with my Mom and we'll spend a few days OFF! No lesson planning, no grading, no guilt. Granted, we'll probably both be guilty of buying school supplies and resource materials. However, it's our OWN time! Yaaaaaaaaaay!

Muffin Tin Mondays

2010-11-07T19:54:00.000-08:00

One of the exciting changes to my classroom this year is the addition of an event called "Muffin Tin Mondays", where our lunch every Monday is served in a muffin tin! All of it! This may not sound exciting to you, but to five and six year olds this is pretty darn thrilling. It's also pretty awesome for the parents (and teacher) who get to have a day off from packing a lunch.

I began planning for this over the summer, found my muffin tins on sale at Michaels, and started planning what I hoped would be exciting menus for our meals. I had visions of mini sandwiches, muffins, cutely shaped fruits and veggies, etc. I knew that I would have a small class, so I pictured having parents rotate through helping provide the meals, each bringing in a "class set" of something every two or three weeks.

My school is a Peanut-Free zone, which is actually pretty easy to work with...but then I was hit with a triple whammy. One of my small fry is allergic to eggs, wheat, and dairy. Eggs, wheat, AND dairy! Not only that, but to get specialty food items which he can eat is freaking expensive and nearly impossible in this more isolated region. Another student is not allowed candy. Sweet treats, yes, but no candy. Ever. Even at Halloween. What a curveball!

So, our Muffin Tin Monday meals are slightly different than anticipated. Heavier on the fruits and veggies (a good thing, I know), very little dairy (and when there is cheese, this student brings soy cheese. He calls himself Soy Boy. It's hilarious!), lots of popcorn, very little wheat, and next to no treats. Fortunately this dear student's mother is a prolific baker who is always willing to provide the class with something safe to eat! For the most part, I've found it easier to provide much of the meal myself, in order to avoid all possible allergens.

(This is from our first special lunch!)

It's a good thing that the little ones are always excited to eat their meals from the muffin tins...even if they are eating grapes and carrots. Again.

Tomorrow's menu? Carrots, blueberries, apple slices, pear slices, crackers with Nutella, popcorn, and cheese cubes. Yummy!

Forest Adventures!

2010-11-06T19:22:00.000-07:00

One of the things that you quickly learn when living in a island community like this one is that sunny days are few and far between (especially at this time of year!), and when they come you have to get out! This was one of those "Quick! Get your coats! Get your outside shoes! Get your explorer hats! Get your shovels! We're going on a bear hunt!" kind of moments!

That first picture is from the beginning of our forest adventure...after the hats, paper binoculars, and shovels had become more of a hindrance than a help. :) Would you believe that this is only about 100 metres from our classroom?

We hiked for about 10 minutes before finding this excellent clearing. Hills, stumps, fallen logs, standing trees...lots of dirt, and lots of fun!

We found a bear den! Only, it wasn't really a den, it wasn't big enough for a bear, and it was completely unoccupied. That didn't stop the imaginations!

We hacked several fallen logs to smithereens with our little shovels...yay for wet, rotting, crumbly wood!

There were plenty of opportunities for climbing, balancing, and scaring the teacher!

Unfortunately, the only pictures of the kids investigating with magnifying glasses has too much detail of their faces, so I can't post them here.

What a great way to spend part of an afternoon!

PS--Check out the short update on the cookie baking endeavour, found on the previous blog post...

The Joys of a Small School...

2010-11-05T19:45:00.000-07:00

One of the unique things about teaching in a small school, located in a small community, is that teachers have the opportunity to interact daily with many students who are in many different classes. This year, for example, in addition to teaching all subjects to Kindergarten and Grade One students, I also teach P.E. every day to Grades Two and Three and Music once a week for Grades Seven and Eight. I was one of the sponsors for the flag football tournament two weeks ago, which involved 22 hours of driving (round trip), four hours on a ferry (round trip), three hours waiting for the ferry, multiple stops at gas stations/stores/etc, and camping out with the entire team at my Mom's place over a four day period.

*side note* Whenever possible, do long trips with a group of kids who are accustomed to the mantra that "if we miss this ferry we have to wait at least two more hours"...they know to keep their bathroom/snack breaks really fast. Man, that part was easy! Even stopping at the mall with a bunch of teenagers was easy! Nothing like living over four hours away from the nearest big center to really increase the amount of desire amongst everyone for some "big city shopping!" Also, EB Games is a wonderful babysitter. I dropped my collection of boys off there, told them not to leave, and did a ten-minute whirlwind tour of the bookstore, chocolate shop, and Starbucks. Fun times!

*back to the point* The trip was actually very fun, and quite painless, and tonight the football team is having a scavenger hunt party. Sometime in the next hour I expect groups of students to be converging upon my apartment to bake cookies, eat cookies, and deliver cookies to someone else, before heading off on their next task.

Why am I saying all of this? Why am I rambling on with atrociously long run-on sentences? Here's why. I love teaching in a school system where this is all "ok"...where I don't have to worry that someone is going to flip out about their preteens stopping at a teacher's house on a Friday night (with their drivers, of course), and where we can enjoy time spent in and out of school with a variety of people. Don't get me wrong. The system in which I work has it's downsides. Major downsides. The community in which I live has it's downsides, too (*cough* over four hours to the nearest bookstore *cough*). But, I get to bake cookies with the big kids on a Friday night. Awesome!

Now to end with the funniest Kindergarten moment of the week!

Small boy, "E", sticks his juice box and straw in front of my face and says "Open It."

I, obviously, respond with "E! You need to ask me nicely!"

He flutters his eyelashes, looks endearingly at me, and says in his most convincing voice... "will you please open my juice box, Sweetheart?"

I die.

UPDATE:

Grade Seven and Eight students learned that it's not possible to make cookies "bake faster!", and had to be deterred from trying the "turn the oven up to 500 degrees" method...too fun!

Midweek Madness

2010-11-04T16:46:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how one little thing can throw off an entire week. For us it's Week of Prayer. That means that the first half hour of every day is over in the church for assembly. Sounds good, and they've been enjoying the meetings, but it means that the routine of the day is different. Routines being as crucial as they are, this is a bad thing! We'll survive for one more day, then have a three day week next week...then a long weekend! Woohoo!

Joke of the day: Why do we carry umbrellas when it rains? Because umbrellas can't walk!

Non-Joke of the day: What do you get when you combine a sunrise at 8:26am, dark clouds, heavy rain, a migraine, a couple of burned out lights, a change in routine, and cranky children? Grumpy Teacher.

I'm baaaack!

2010-10-20T18:04:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how one messed up summer can drastically change all plans. Yikes! That said, with the school year well under way again, I'm finally ready to get back to blogging. What better way to do so than with humour?

First: Student wails, caterwauls, shrieks, giggles, and generally makes a huge ruckus for no apparent reason. What does any sane teacher ask the student to do? Stop the noise, of course! How did this charming student respond? "But teacher, I'm just making a joyful noise to the Lord!" I didn't pursue it.

Next: Knock, knock? Who's there? Toilet. Or, monkey on the toilet. Or, any other possible attempt to get away with using bathroom words. At lunch time. *sigh*

Then: M says "Teacher! O pinched me!"
I say "O, why did you pinch M?"
O replies "He told me to pinch!"
I say "M, why did you tell O to pinch you?"
M replies "Because I was spanking her."
I didn't pursue that, either.

Finally: We took a field trip to the local police station. A wonderful time was had by all, the students all behaved, no one got tied into the restraint chair (though they did ask), no one was left in jail (again, they asked), the students were thrilled to find out that prisoners get to eat Eggo waffles for breakfast (and wanted to become prisoners, themselves!)...and the officers mostly kept straight faces. Why is this important? Here are the questions that I dropped off ahead of time...as a warning! I felt that they deserved to know what sort of things they were in for, and was actually very pleased that the kids remembered so many of them so that I could watch the reactions!

Kindergarten-Grade One Questions to ask the Police Men and Women
1. What do prisoners drink? (Around here? Nothing suitable for students, haha.)
2. Do Police Officers go to jail?
3. Do Police Officers get tickets?
4. What do prisoners sleep on?
5. What do pregnant prisoners sleep on?
6. What do prisoners eat?
7. Do Police Officers take care of mean animals? (Fortunately, I was able to redirect this one when the officers looked worried about having to talk about their answer!)
8. How and where do prisoners go to the bathroom? (One little darling sniffed the jail cell's sink, to see how clean it was. Who does that?)
9. Do on-duty officers sleep in the station?
10. Do Police Dogs get bathroom breaks? (NEWS UPDATE! Police dogs are trained to go before a mission, and then just "hold it"! If dogs can do this, why can't five year olds?)
11. Does Port Hardy have Police Dogs? Nope! The nearest Police Dog is two and a half hours away.
12. How does the Police boat catch speeders?
13. Do Police Officers deal with people who break the law by taking their boats too close to the whales in the water?
14. Where do officers store their gear? In lockers, like the big kids at school.
15. Where do Police Dogs stay? With their trainers.
16. What do Police Officers do when people are shooting?
17. Do bad guys in P.H. throw people to the whales to get eaten? No.
18. Do Police Officers get bathroom breaks when they are on a mission?
19. In the olden days, where did Police Officers keep their horses? In their barns.
20. Do Police Officers get in fights with each other?
21. Do Police Officers get bathroom breaks? (Clearly, this was VERY important!)
22. Do Police Officers take care of people who are in danger?
23. Do Police Officers kill dangerous animals who are attacking? Not unless they have to.
24. Do Police Officers save animals from danger?
25. Do Police Officers find fossils?

Then, these unexpected gems came up:

26. Can you use your cell phone to call heaven? No, the long distance charges would be expensive.
27. Can you use your cell phone to call hell? No.
28. Why do you have a wheel chair with a seatbelt? (That was the chair with restraints. The officer froze up, I thought fast and told the students that sometimes prisoners forget that it's in their best interest to just sit still and behave...just like students sometimes forget that it's best to just stay in time out and be still. The officer looked very relieved. Hahaha...)
29. Do you get to eat lunch?
30. Will you shoot me with your gun?

The officers only choked once. I had to step out once to laugh, and repeatedly ensured that I didn't make any eye contact with the adults in the room.

Gotta love the little ones!

Roller Coaster

2010-08-22T16:25:00.001-07:00

This has been a summer of emotions! Big ups, huge downs, and everything in between.

I'm down to only a few days before returning to P.H. and have way too much still to accomplish.

Will I make it? Today I think so, tomorrow, who knows?!

Summer! Or, "My Rebuttal to Those-Who-Believe-That-Teachers-Have-Summers-Off"

2010-07-15T21:16:00.000-07:00

Well, look at this! It hasn't even been a full week, and here I go posting again. Woohoo!

I am so excited to only be teaching two grades this coming year: Kindergarten and Grade One. Yay for revamping the elementary end of the school! Suddenly, school life seems manageable again! Granted, I have absolutely no idea how many students I might end up with (due to tuition incentives and a public school in town closing)...but at least I know what I'll teach!

I'm also excited to have my Math, Language Arts, Science, and PE course overviews ready to go, my thematic units planned out by month, and all of the subjects planned for the year (I just don't have all of the learning outcomes/official stuff attached to each). I have to get my "theme boxes" filled with all of the resources and supplies for the different units, but that will be fun. Hours of work, but fun. I'm also hoping to get to my actual lesson plans for the first few weeks of school.

I have to buy the school supplies for all of my students, as they really aren't available up on the North Island. Unfortunately, without knowing how many students to buy for, this will be a challenge! I'm hoping to hold out until Teacher Appreciation Days in August at Staples!

Along with those, I've been down to Montana while Mom defended her Masters' Thesis, spent a small fortune at book stores, spent another small fortune at fabric stores, and made a baby quilt (well, it still needs to have the edges bound). I've made a running trip back to P.H., spent time cleaning out my classroom, re-did my apartment (thanks, in most part, to Mom's hard work!), and divided resources to send all of the Grade Two materials to the Grades Two and Three teacher.

I have my new classroom blog up and running, our new travelling buddy off on his first adventure, and lots of little projects lined up for the summer (doll quilts, new curtains for the classroom, etc).

Did I mention Camp Meeting? Yep, Mom and I are leading out for the 3&4 year old division again (yay!). We'll head down next week to clean out spiders and mice in preparation for all of our little people.

I have to take two courses this summer. Neither one holds a whole lot of interest for me, but they are required. *sigh* At least I am able to challenge the exams! I just have to do a lot of studying.

It's been busy so far, and the summer is only going to get busier.

Teachers' Meetings, August 24-26. during this time I will be labeling pencil boxes, markers, crayons, pencil crayons, erasers, notebooks, duotangs, waterbottles, and everything else which will go on the student desks. Each. And. Every. Crayon. Seems ridiculous, but saves a lot of hassle later on.

Race up to P.H. for an intense five days of reorganizing and setting up my classroom, prepping for all of the students who will (hopefully!) have registered, packing up the school supply kits, photocopying madly, laminating like a maniac, slapping name tags everywhere, labeling everything in the room so that students see real language at work, tripping over the horrible carpet in my classroom (unless, by some miracle, it's been really repaired or replaced. That, however, would mean hauling everything out of my room and then bringing it back in), and then racing back to Kelowna before Friday, September 3.

Labour Day weekend is my cousin Danielle's wedding (for which I am official coordinator). Then, race back to P.H. and get back just in time for school to start on Tuesday, September 7. There will only be a month of consistency before I'm racing back to Kelowna for my brother Shaun's wedding to Sarah (for which I'm helping to make the cakes, taste tests and such to be done in August)!

I'm tired just looking at the list! My saving grace is that so much of the studying, course outlining, label-making, supply sorting, and quilting can be done outside. In the sun. Or, in the shade. In the mountains. At the beach. Without getting up at 5:00am.

*bliss*

Meet Blackberry

2010-07-11T14:08:00.000-07:00

I'm looking for classrooms for a small black bear (stuffed, of course) to visit over the next school year. Blackberry would like to visit students of all ages in their classrooms...all over the world, preferably! His adventures will be chronicled on my classroom blog and will also be tracked on a big map in my classroom. This year I will be teaching Kindergarten-Grade One. Let me know if you are interested!

Blackberry's picture will be posted...but I think that I may have left him in Port Hardy! It might be a few weeks before you get to see him!

Link to my Classroom Blog

2010-07-11T13:26:00.000-07:00

Sooooo...this whole blog more often thing isn't working so well for me. I've now set my cell phone alarm to remind me to post! *sigh*

That said, I've set up a classroom blog. It will involve pictures and details about what's happening in my classroom. It's going to be a daily blog...enforced!...as I will be using it to keep parents informed. As it is going to include pictures of my students, it will be set to "private" once the school year has started. Feel free to check it out before then, and to request access if you want it! :)

http://shannong.edublogs.org/

Many of the postings will be duplicated, minus the specific student details and pictures, on this site.

Almost...Summer...Can't...Wait...!

2010-06-23T19:59:00.000-07:00

How do I encourage myself to blog more frequently? What would it take to get more stuff up on this silly page? Perhaps I should set a "blog now!" alert on my cell phone, every week or so. That might help.

That said, it's almost summertime! Woohoo! One more day!

A Rant...

2010-02-19T18:15:00.000-08:00

Dear _________________,

When you come in for an unplanned and unscheduled "observation" on the first day back after a four day weekend (which was immediately preceded by 100th Day and then Valentine's Day celebrations, please remember that what you see is neither normal nor typically considered to be "acceptable" in my eyes.

Please do not comment on the disorder (or disaster) in my classroom. Don't "suggest" that I have my students help to clean up periodically throughout the day. Trust me. I pick my battles. This was NOT the day for that battle. Most days we have clean-ups before recess, lunch, PE, and after centers. Most days we have a routine.

Please do not pick up workbooks from the (admittedly messy) piles. Honestly, they are none of your business. Telling me that it appears that I am behind in leaving "teacher tracks", and that prompt corrections/responses are vital in primary grades is a given. What you do not know, because you didn't ask, is that I check the work carefully as they do it, making corrections as we go. The fact that I am behind in leaving stickers on pages is regrettable, but more regrettable is the fact that you didn't check to see if the answers were correct. Also, when there are incorrect answers on the page, it's probably because I was dealing with one of my "strong-willed" students. Again, it's called picking my battles. One page with wrong answers will not kill anyone.

Please do not tell me that you can see that I have "strong-willed" students in my classroom. I know that what you are really saying is that the kids are out of control. I know! Did you not see my face!?! It is also bothersome that you commented on the fact that you know that students play up when you are in the room (unannounced). I know it, you know it, they know it...don't rub it in.

Finally, please understand that 80% of my class is male. Not only that, they range in age from a young 5 to barely 8 years old. This means that every day is full of strong-willed children doing things that make normal human beings shudder with either disgust, fear, or dismay. Dealing with hitting is a normal part of my day. Rude jokes/words/pictures are part of my day. Tantrums are part of my day. Sometimes pretending not to see things is the best plan. If I occasionally ignore the much-deserved retaliatory punch, it's ok...everyone deserves pay-back sometimes.

Please know that I do appreciate that you noticed that I consistently follow through with consequences/discipline/expectations.

My bottom line is this: Unless you have taught my group of kids, in my classroom, on the first day back from holidays, then take a lesson from me...pick your battles.

Sincerely,

Shannon

Just call me Mary Poppins...

2010-01-09T20:56:00.000-08:00

I don't mean to imply that I am "practically perfect in every way", or that I can magically make children want to clean up their toys. For that matter, I don't have the ability to jump into a chalk picture. However, I have the bag. (Most days I actually have two bags, which get carried pretty much everywhere. Sometimes the items are condensed into only a purse.)

It seems that I have gotten a bit of a reputation in my small community. I am the one who has everything. Occupy 10 or so small children during a funeral? Go to Miss Gerber. Need a band aid while at a hockey game? Go to Miss Gerber. Need a pen/pencil/sharpie/eraser/notebook? Go to...well, you get the point.

For the sake of my own amusement, I am now going to present you with a current inventory of my purse/school bag. This list is in no particular order, except that it's the order of items as they were pulled out of the bag!

*Bigger Bag (contents on school days would also include lunch, and would likely not include my Bible)

-water bottle
-3 granola bars
-half package of M&Ms
-small notebook with lined paper
-copy of "The Very Hungry Caterpillar"
-box of Crayola Twistable Mini crayons
-Bible (The bag went to church today!)
-10 colouring pages (current theme: Noah's Ark)
-3 packages of stickers (trucks, misc. animals, and stars)
-small stuffed dog
-2 Hot Wheels cars (this number widely varies, with up to 5 or 6 cars, depending on the event)
-6 colourful plastic bugs
-1 stretchy lizard
-1 container of Silly Putty (started out as 3, but two were given away)
-Hockey Jersey shaped sticky notes
-2 small pads of sticky notes
-hand sanitizer
-hand lotion
-6 small barrettes
-1 package of Benylin
-1 pair of black socks
-1 pair of black gloves
-pencil sharpener
-cell phone charger
-flashlight
-roll of masking tape
-gum
-black Sharpie

*Purse contents

-wallet
-cell phone
-Bluetooth device
-car keys
-school keys with flash drive
-additional school keys (dumpster, filing cabinet, etc)
-additional USB flash drive
-MP3 player with headphones
-First Aid Kit (Band aids in assorted sizes, polysporin, gauze pads)
-Kleenex Spash 'n Go wipes
-regular Kleenex tissues
-cough drops
-big bottle of Advil Liqui-Gels
-Vicks inhaler thing
-comb
-mascara
-eye shadow
-pressed powder makeup
-2 chapsticks
-nail clippers
-gum
-mini Coffee Crisp
-half of a Kit Kat bar
-small felt raccoon (should have left that at church today!)
-long plaid ribbon
-wrist support brace
-2 granola bars
-1 Lindt chocolate
-2 candy canes ( 1 big, 1 little)
-small sticky notes
-empty ziploc bag (handy for when students, or brothers, have garbage to get rid of!)
-glue stick
-bag of change (for children's offerings at church and/or impromptu math lessons)
-spoon
-4 mini Sharpies (assorted colours)
-1 silver Sharpie
-1 red Sharpie pen
-1 Stainless Steel Refillable Sharpie (love it!)
-mechanical pencil
-blue pen
-7 hair bands
-7 hair pins
-4 hair clips
-list of Bible texts
-1 eraser
-3 safety pins
-1 paper clip
-school phone list

Suffice to say that it is rare that I need something which I don't have or can't replace with something else!

Upon reflection, I'm almost scared of those content lists! At the same time, I realize that I have a slight scissor deficiency, and might need to remedy that situation.

So, what's in YOUR bag?

Highlights and Lowlights...

2010-01-07T17:01:00.000-08:00

This week has been a very up and down sort of week! If you read my post from yesterday, you saw most of the lows. Having to start school again after the holiday was also a low! Sending two of my students to the principal in the first 5 minutes of the day today? Low.

There have been highs too. Today the entire class sat still and quietly for almost 10 minutes while we read a story at the end of the day. Trust me, this is a miracle! (Mom, it was the new book that you sent them. They were THRILLED to get a present from you!) The fact that no one has been late, no one has gotten sick, and no one has gotten hurt is also a high! The kindergartener's lucky day was also a definite high.

There are also the high/low moments. They manage to be both a downer and an upper at the same time. Being told by a sixth grade girl that my hair was "ummm...slightly frizzier than normal" was hilarious! It also sent me to a mirror. Having one of my darling kindergarten students drop her jaw upon finding out how old I am turning this month, and then exclaim in shock "TEACHER! You are YOUNGER than my GRANDPA!" was almost devastating, but also incredibly funny! Dear child, I will be turning 25. That's an "ouch".

Very few things, or people, make me laugh like my kindergarten students. While I love the first and second graders dearly, there is just something about a kindergartener! Today we had this conversation while working on our seat work.

Student 1: Teacher, just WHY aren't you married yet?

Teacher: Umm..I guess I'm just not ready. (What? It seemed like a safe answer at the time. No need to share my point of view on the eligibility of the options here in PH!)

Student 2: What, your mom won't allow it? (Direct quote, by the way.)

Teacher: ... (Really, I had no words)

Student 3: Oh come on, stop being mean to teacher!

Then, just minutes later, we had this gem of a conversation.

Student 3: Teacher! This is a "you" angel!

Teacher: Well, thank you A, that's very sweet of you!

Student 2: There are no teacher angels. That's just very unusual. (Again, a direct quote.)

*sigh*

Even on a rainy, whiny, hectic Thursday, they make me smile!

A Lucky Day...

2010-01-06T14:20:00.000-08:00

I would be very hesitant to say that it was my lucky day. After all, there were many factors against it from the beginning!
a) I watched the Canadian World Junior hockey team lose in overtime last night, putting me in a sad mood (not my fault!).
b) I stayed up way too late (totally my fault).
c) I had to get up early (the alarm clock's fault).
d) I ran out of hot water (ok, that's my fault).
e) I got to school later than I would have liked (mostly my fault).
f) I only had the chance to drink half of my coffee before the other half got cold (not my fault...ish).
g) I had to go pick two kids up at the bus stop two kilometers away from school (not my fault).
h) My students arrived grumpy and hyper (not my fault).
i) We had three temper tantrums in our classroom before morning recess (I hope that they were not my fault!).
j) I forgot my lunch (you figure out where the blame lies).
k) My first kindergarten student arrived 15 minutes early, meaning that I only had a 10 minute break, rather than 25 minutes (not my fault).
l) More tantrums.
m) Staff meeting happens after school.

Wow, that was a rant and a half!

The luck comes in for one of my dear kindergarteners. This converstaion can't be retold any better than in direct quotes.

Student: TEACHER! It's my lucky day!
Me: Oh? Why is it your lucky day?
Student: I learned that I could do something I never thought that I would be able to do!
Me: Tell me about it!
Student: When I went to the bathroom I learned that I could go POO at SCHOOL!!! I didn't think that would EVER happen!

Life must be good, right? :)

Resolutions

2010-01-02T10:20:00.000-08:00

In the spirit of New Years Resolutions, I am going to share mine with you all. Please note that some of them may be more sarcastic than serious (not a surprise if you know me!).

1. I resolve to only make resolutions that I might be able to keep.
2. I resolve to blog more frequently.
3. I resolve to think fewer unkind thoughts about people (please note that I didn't suggest that I might stop completely).
4. I resolve to spend less time watching mindless television in the evenings.
5. I resolve to get out of Port Hardy for retail therapy more frequently.
6. I resolve to eat more vegetables.
7. I resolve to be more patient with stupid jokes made by small boys.
8. I resolve to procrastinate less often.
9. I resolve to actively search for a Masters program.
10. I resolve to begin with the first three resolutions, and then add one more each month so that by July I'll be working on all of them.

Keep me on track! Don't let me give up! Comment on my blog so that I know that someone is reading!

Have You Ever...

2009-12-12T19:19:00.000-08:00

Just because I felt like doing something pointless...I filled this out! The items I’ve done are in bold!

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater (OK, so sitting on someone's lawn while watching movies on a giant screen probably doesn't count, but it's close!)
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House (I wasn't actually inside...but it counts, right?)
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chicken pox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous (Does it count if they weren't famous yet?)
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day

Funny!

2009-12-02T18:35:00.000-08:00

Two Kindergarten anecdotes, to give me a break from these report cards!

During prayer request time:
"I" requested that "the world will start spinning faster and faster so that we will start to puke and get to go home!"

During a math assessment:
"A" said, upon being asked to use purple to colour the balloon with a number 7, "PURPLE!? That disturbs me."

How does a teacher stay grumpy?

What happened to my good intentions?

2009-11-29T15:08:00.000-08:00

They went out the window, to allow for planning, instructing, and enjoying my three-grade classroom experience! Yes, this year has been very busy. Last year I felt like I was getting into a groove with my two grades...grades one and two...despite all of the behaviour problems that were going on. The kids were learning, some were excelling, and I was hitting all of the necessary learning outcomes. Woohoo!

Then came this year. Welcome to the classroom, Kindergarteners! The groove is still forming. Sure, I am very blessed to have only grades one and two in the morning, for our serious academic time. This is a very small class (isolated community, small private school)...and the potential for learning is great. Most days, the actual learning is great too! I love my students dearly, and the day just gets more exciting when the kindergarteners arrive at lunch time.

What does Miss G. do? I boot the older kids to the lunch room, have approximately 20 minutes to eat, use the washroom (on a good day!), clean up the class room, photocopy, set up for kindergarten, and BOOM! There they are! I have 25 minutes with just kindergarten. On a good day we can accomplish calendar time, worship, and some sort of math lesson. On a bad day we can barely check the weather before the grade one and two students return.

I whole-heartedly advocate for a multi-grade classroom. The benefits for socialization are huge. The opportunities for learning are incredible. It's awesome! Most weeks I am sufficiently planned to have all three grades working and learning the correct material for their class, and I have (if I can toot my own horn for a moment) become pretty darn good at creating group activities which are differentiated enough for all of the students.

But every once in a while I would love to teach one grade. Just one. It really doesn't matter WHICH one. One set of Ministry of Education requirements. One set of learning outcomes. One set of lesson plans. One set of everything!

Why am I feeling this way today? Could it be the fact that I have 6 distinct reading groups (out of 10 students)? Could it be that I am in desperate need of a holiday?

Could it be that it is report card time and I have three distinct report cards to create, with a reporting requirement which nearly doubles my workload?

...I think that I have found my answer.

First Day of School!

2009-09-08T23:27:00.000-07:00

Enter Kindergarten student who turns five next month (end of October), literally bouncing into the room today.
"Teacher! Teacher! Teacher! It's my first day of school!"
"Yes, A, it is! I'm glad you are here!"
"And, TEACHER! Tomorrow will be my SECOND day of school!"
"That's right, what a smart boy!"
"Then, after THAT, is my THIRD day of school!"
(By now I am trying desperately to keep from laughing, which means not making eye contact with any of the adults who are within earshot!)
"You are right, A. The next day will be your third day."
"TEACHER! Then comes my school day four! FOUR! Like ME! I'm FOUR!"

*sigh*
What a great way to start the year!

Ode to Comsifter

2009-08-28T13:58:00.001-07:00

To my dear friend, Comsifter,

*ahem*

You might be useful, you might make sense.
Protecting students, a virtual fence.

You block out the bad stuff, so children can't see,
and once in a blue moon you do protect me.

HOWEVER...

You screw up the sites that I need every day,
the info for work, and Facebook for play!

Your classification of what is outlawed
makes so little sense, it's intrinsically flawed.

AND...

While students may know just how to bypass,
I can never remember what I've heard in the past.

SO...

If you want to be useful, just let me have fun.
Block out the evil, for all and for one.

If you can't manage to decipher my meaning,
then I will write something which might not get past screening.

You. Suck.

Trip to Albuquerque and Florida...Part One

2009-08-14T19:16:00.000-07:00

Well, it has been too long since I posted, and I hope to make up for it with some pictures!
My Mom and I are currently travelling in the southern part of the United States, on holiday before our teachers' convention cruise (yes, that's right...they're sending us on a cruise!).
We started with a couple of days in Albuquerque, New Mexico, where we visited with my grandparents, shopped at a teacher supply store (my own personal mecca, perhaps?),

and just enjoyed some time off.

Then, we traveled to Miami, stayed overnight in Ft. Lauderdale, and toured for a bit before continuing on. Wouldn't you know, we found another teacher supply store in the Ft. Lauderdale area! No pictures of that one, as we were too busy drinking
coffee and driving to get a picture.

In Ft. Lauderdale we spent some time at Flamingo Gardens, a wildlife refuge (for permanently injured creatures) and botanical garden. The following friend greeted us as we arrived!

Our next two friends were hanging out in the water...and I was glad that there was a fence between us.

Here are a couple more friends...and the only "Florida Panther" we saw in the refuge. The two real cats were hiding, and we didn't see the skating Panthers either!

As we drove further north, we approached this storm...

...which turned into this...

...and then this! I was glad that Mom was driving.

We subsequently saw this sign, which made me laugh. Torrential rain, and
less watering.

Our trip today also included quick trips to the United Kingdom and Australia. Just in case you wanted to feel jealous! :)

To cap it off for today, this is for Caitlin! We were listening to "Welcome to the Future" as we drove past this sign. It made us laugh. History, the Future, it's all there!

Oh, and this is for Auntie Karen! I was devastated to miss the opportunity to take a picture of the "Modern Mushroom Farms" truck. I know that this will be tragic for you too!

Coming tomorrow...pictures of St. Augustine, Florida. Watch for the Fountain of Youth, the Oldest School in the US, and the Showboat Carwash.

Good Grief!

2009-08-03T18:52:00.000-07:00

Could it really be that in 5 weeks I will be counting down the hours until school begins? Where has the summer gone?

I begin to scare myself when I realize that I have the following to accomplish/complete before September 8 (which seems incredibly late for a first day, but that's when Labour Day is!):

1. Course outlines for Math, Science, Socials, Bible, PE, Music, and Art...for K, Grade 1, and Grade 2. Only a few of those can overlap!
2. Thematic units for the whole school year.
3. Teacher's convention (leave next Monday, spend a few days with my grandparents in Albuquerque, a couple of fun days in Florida, then attend meetings until Friday August 21).
4. Buy school supplies for all of my students.
5. Travel back to Port Hardy on Monday and Tuesday (August 24-25). With summer ferry traffic.
6. Report to school on Wednesday August 26.
7. Finish setting up my classroom.
8. Registration night on August 27.
9. Photocopy and prepare workbooks.
10. Actually make lesson plans.
11........and so it goes.

Yikes!

Oops!

2009-08-02T19:39:00.000-07:00

Well, I haven't posted in a little over two weeks...but I have a good reason!
Part One Of The Excuse: My computer was dead, so my time was more limited (though Mom and Caitlin were very willing to let me borrow their computers whenever I needed to do so).
Part Two of The Excuse: I was busy! Camping (in a tent), taking online courses, and leading a group of 3&4 year olds for 8 days causes exhaustion (and the setting up for 4 days prior to that doesn't help).

Now, however, I have my computer back and am in the process of trying to replace all that was lost. I am finished my courses, and only have 18 course outlines to create. I'll post more often!

The Frustrations Abound...

2009-07-15T18:24:00.000-07:00

So here I am, already breaking a resolution. I don't know if I'll be able to find enough positives to discuss in order to sandwich each negative today! So, this will be a Dagwood sandwich.

Positive: I got to spend some time at the beach today! Warm weather, a bit of a breeze...it was lovely.

Negatives:
Oh man! This is just not my evening!
First, I'm taking two online courses this summer. Woo-freaking-hoo. Neither course is one that I particularly want to take, but I am because I have to do so! Now, the one course requires a book of which I cannot get a copy (and was informed of the need for said book two days before the course start date). The other course was to have ended today (with assignment submission permitted for another week), and the last three assignments haven't even been posted!

Second: Curriculum overviews for next year. OK, I see the need. Yes, I even see value. However, the BC curriculum guidelines are NOT designed for classrooms with three grades. It's tough enough to get through every required learning outcome for one grade in a single grade classroom. To get through the curriculum for three grades at once? Very difficult. There are no considerations for multi-grade classrooms, no suggestions for which things to skip/combine/over-lap/etc, and a whole lot of nothing for ideas to combine the curricula. Therefore, I have to start pretty much entirely working from scratch. That's fine, but it also means that I have to be able to justify the reason for not using more than about 20% of the recommended resources for the grades...and this year is a government audit year.

Perfect.

I'll get over the aggravation. I'll make it work. It will be a fabulous year. But right now? In July? I could just throw it all out the window.

Third: I am missing the funeral for a friend's father, because it would have required nearly 14 hours of travel each way. That sucks.

Fourth: That computer of mine is on it's way to Vancouver for repairs. Just perfect.

Positive: I have plenty of computers to borrow and use in order to express my frustrations.

What to say?

2009-07-14T17:58:00.000-07:00

Positive: I finally got my Staples Teacher Card stuff sorted out! Yay for discounts and rewards!
Negative: My computer is being shipped to Vancouver for repairs, and will not return to me for at least 2 weeks.
Positive: I have other computers at my disposal, and all of my most important documents backed up!

Sdaly, I must also report that the new EXPO retractable dry-erase markers are not available at the Kelowna Staples location. This is most unfortunate, as I was very excited to try them!

A New Resolution

2009-07-10T21:28:00.000-07:00

...It is entirely shameful that I have been so out of touch with this blog. Sure, I spend what seems like hours every evening either with email or Facebook, but so rarely update this!
I have a goal! My goal is to post something (almost anything!) on this blog at least once a week. That shouldn't be too difficult! I may post far more frequently, sometimes...
I have a second goal. This involves having at least two positive things to say for every negative item on the blogging agenda (the sandwich effect). Can I do it? Yes. Will I? That remains to be seen!

So, positive number one. I can't seem to stop searching for classroom deals! I found a class set of pillows for only $3.49 each! I saved $12 on each one! The kids will love being able to sit on something comfy for stories or videos, and I might be able to get rid of some chairs from the room.

Negative. I have to take two classes this summer. One is "in progress" and the other starts next week. I really haven't felt yet like either class will be of any use or has anything to say of interest to me. That's frustrating! I'd love to take classes in something exciting or useful! Having hours each day devoted to things which are simply annoying is like working on report cards during the summer. EVIL!

Positive number two. The sun is shining! Warm weather! Tim Hortons exists! Starbucks is here! I've been to Chapters twice! Traffic lights! Summer in the city!
I love Port Hardy, but there is nothing quite like being able to meander through a bookstore with a mocha in one hand and a pile of new reading material in the other!

Student Awards

2009-06-19T15:48:00.000-07:00

In the spirit of the end of the year (yay!), and the writing of report cards (boooo!), I have some proposed awards to be given out this year. This is my way of writing the snarky comments I could never get away with!

Shannon’s Proposed Class Awards

1.Fastest Runner (outdoors)
2.Fastest Runner (indoors)
3.Most Laps Run Around the School (for fun)
4.Most Laps Run Around the School (by force)
5.The Houdini Award (physical escape)
6.The Houdini Award (verbal avoidance)
7.Fewest Tattles in One Day
8.Most Tattles in One Day
9.Best Attendance Record
10.Frequent Absence Award
11.Fewest Band-Aids in One Year
12.Most Band-Aids in One Year
13.The Patience of Job Award
14.The Temper of Jezebel Award
15.Most “Problem Sheets” Sent Home
16.Most Office Visits
17.Most Hallway Chats
18.Quietest Worker
19.Loudest Screamer
20.Quickest Worker
21.Neatest Worker
22.Most Accurate Worker
23.Cleaner-Upper
24.Mess Maker
25.Rock Throwing (best aim)
26.Rock Throwing (worst aim)
27.Best “Neeah!” Face
28.Top Speller
29.Most Imaginative (positive)
30.Most Imaginative (negative)
31.Virtue of Sharing (verbal, positive)
32.Virtue of Sharing (verbal, negative)
33.Virtue of Sharing (material, positive)
34.Virtue of Sharing (material, negative)
35.Best Leader (positive)
36.Best Leader (negative)
37.Best Follower (positive)
38.Best Follower (negative)
39.Best Impersonation of the Teacher (teacher in room)
40.Best Impersonation of the Teacher (teacher out of the room)

Continuation of "You know..."

2009-02-10T19:02:00.000-08:00

You know you're a primary school teacher if...

...you actually use the line "I'll pull this van over!" while on a field trip.

...you manage not to laugh/scream/cry/pull your hair out when a troublesome little girl says "those boys are giving me a headache!".

You Know You're A Primary School Teacher If...

2009-02-07T21:12:00.000-08:00

Good grief! Has it really been this long since I posted to this blog? What have I been doing with my time? Oh, that's right...I've been doing such things as will be found in the following sections of this post! I've been having such fun creating new status updates for my Facebook page, using the sentence starter "You know you're a primary school teacher if...", that I decided to actually compile a list! Enjoy. :)

You Know You're a Primary School Teacher If...

1)...you are convinced that there are never enough scissors, glue sticks, or sharp pencils.

2)...the words "I'll count to three..." form a significant portion of your daily vocabulary.

3)...you have become an expert at walking down hallways backwards in order to referee your students.

4)...you spend your evenings sorting safety pins and beads into tiny ziploc baggies.

5)...you will be spending many hours of the weekend preparing activities for the 100th day of school.

6)...you buy skeins of yarn with the idea that they "might be useful for something".

7)...you are drawn to yarn which is called "crayon".

8)...you spend more of your own money on school supplies than on clothes/shoes...

9)...you fret over the fact that the traveling penguin stuffy belonging to your class does not have a scarf, and knit one out of the previously mentioned crayon yarn.

10)...the word "stuffy" is actually a part of your vocabulary.

11)...you have purchased, or plan to purchase, two-way baby monitors for the occasional times when you actually have to leave your classroom.

.....more to come as situations arise!

TeacherSense (or, A Day In The Life of a Primary School Teacher)

2008-11-20T17:40:00.001-08:00

(Tune: The WIlliam Tell Overture)

You really have to see the original upon which this particular masterpiece is based. Go to Youtube! Look up "Momsense" by Anita Renfroe! Enjoy!

TeacherSense, or A Day In The Life Of A Primary School Teacher

Woke up late, woke up late, woke up late today
Rushed around, stubbed my toe, oh what can I say?
Spilled my drink, stopped to think, took some time to pray
Got to school and was on time today

Supervise, supervise, gotta watch the kids
Find the stuff, say hello, find the one who hid
Fix the book, heal the scrape, is it just THursday?
What? You're sick?! I didn't ask for this.

Come on in, sit on down it's time to read our story and listen to me
What is happening to you that makes you act as if you're only three?
Yes I know a bear attacked a man and I know about the plane that crashed
I am sure that in here we're safe and I'm sorry that your toy is smashed

Let's work now, let's think now, please stay on task..I'm begging you
Today it is Thursday, and yes, one plus one is two

Recess time, recess time, recess time is here
Rain is bad, you won't melt, no, lunch is not near.
Let's go out, let's go play, line up nice and straight
Wear your coat because it's cold today.

Play outside, Don't play rough, Would you just play fair?
Be polite, Make a friend, Don't forget to share
Work it out, Wait your turn, Never take a dare
Get along, Don't make me come out there

Sit in your chair, get off that chair
Don't sit so close, you're too loud, your inside voice is needed!
Yes, we are going to read out loud
Don't interrupt, it's your turn, let's clean up now for lunch!

Where you going and with whom and why are you not sitting in your chair?
Saying thank you, please, excuse me are good manners you'll need everywhere.
You'll appreciate my wisdom next year when your teacher is so pleased
Can't wait 'til they get to deal with the way you act when you are teased!

You'll thank me for the counsel I gave you so willingly
But right now I thank you NOT to roll your eyes at me

Close your mouth when you chew, Would appreciate
Take a bite, Maybe two, Of the stuff you hate
Use your fork, Do not you burp, Or I'll set you straight
Eat the food that's put in your lunchbag

Get an A, Get the door, Don't get smart with me
Get a Grip, Get in here, I'll count to 3
Get a job, Get a life, Get a PhD
Get a dose of...
I don't care who started it! Your recess will be in the office!
Get your story straight, And tell the truth for once for heaven's sake
And if all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you jump too?

If I've said it once, I've said at least a thousand times before that
You're too old to act this way, it must be your parents' DNA
Look at me when I am talking, stand up straight when you walk
A place for everything, and everything must be in place
Stop crying or I'll give you something real to cry about
Oh!

Let's go home, let's go home, I have work to do
mark the books, clean the room, ack! my grades are due!

Day is done, I am though
***sigh***

And tomorrow we will do this all again because these tasks just never end

You don't need the reason why
Because
Because
Because
Because
I said so
I said so
I said so
I said so
I'm in charge
you're not
you're not
you're not
I'm in charge!

Ta-Da!

New Song!

2008-11-20T17:11:00.000-08:00

Hello to all!

I have here, for your enjoyment, a song I wrote today. Yes, this masterpiece is born of another event occurring at school.

Please think of the song "Christmas Time Is Here" (the one that is sung by Charlie Brown and Company!).

Now that it is in your head, here are the new lyrics.

Head lice time is here
Itchiness and fear
Telephone calls and chemicals
Let's check behind each ear...

Nits are in the hair
Rumours everywhere
Who's the source, and what's the course
of treatment? Please Beware!

Move the coats apart...
Don't we all look smart?
Dollar bills and headache pills
it's not my favourite part.

(pun totally intended. If you didn't get it, sorry)

Yes,
Head lice time is here
Itchiness and fear
Telephone calls and chemicals
Let's check behind each ear...
Telephone calls and chemicals
Let's check behind each ear...

Thank you, thank you very much. Tune in later for "TeacherSense", a day in the life of a primary teacher...in the form of "MomSense" by Anita Renfroe. If you haven't seen that, you must look it up on Youtube.

Sunday Evening Blues

2008-10-26T17:31:00.000-07:00

Start humming John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. Just do it. You know it, trust me!
Now here are the new lyrics.

Sunday Evening Blues

I have the Sunday Evening Blues,
oh, yes, I do!
My weekend's almost done
and Monday is no fun!
Oh-h I have the Sunday evening blues.
(da-na-na-na-na-na-na)

I have the Sunday Evening Blues,
oh, yes, I do!
There's no more sleeping in
'til the weekend comes again,
Oh-h I have the Sunday evening blues.
(da-na-na-na-na-na-na)

I have the Sunday Evening Blues,
oh, yes, I do!
It's off to school I go.
My contract tells me so.
Oh-h I have the Sunday evening blues.
(da-na-na-na-na-na-na)

I have the Sunday Evening Blues,
oh, yes, I do!
My students would agree,
school's not the place to be!
Oh-h I have the Sunday evening blues.
(da-na-na-na-na-na-na)

I have the Sunday Evening Blues,
oh, yes, I do!
Staff Meeting's coming too,
I've got better things to do!
Oh-h I have the Sunday evening blues.
(da-na-na-na-na-na-na)

I have the Sunday Evening Blues,
oh, yes, I do!

(this is where you continue to add verses until you drive yourself, or someone else crazy)

Addendum to the last post...

2008-09-17T17:51:00.001-07:00

Did I mention that between "that's not karate, that's haiku" and "oh sh**" there was an episode of vomiting?

Wednesdays...

2008-09-17T17:51:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd share some of my ponderings, as they developed over the course of the day...

8:00am

Today is Wednesday. Wednesday is a happy day, despite staff meeting after school. Why is it a happy day? Well. Wednesday means only two more days of 5:40am alarm clocks before two days of sleeping in. I love teaching, but do not like mornings.

Wednesday also means CSI:NY! Yes, there is still another week before the new season. Yes, the writers have me all ticked off. Despite that, Detectives Don Flack and Danny Messer are still hot.

So, as I sit in my "City of Atlantis" blue classroom (stupid SCI-FI channel canceling SGA!), drinking my water-based hot beverage in a setting where caffeine is contraband (oh, it's fun to be a rule breaker!), I relish my Wednesday.

Later that morning...

Wednesday's not so great. Whine whine whine...

Six year olds should not be saying "*huff* FINE" to their teachers!

Lunch time...

Overheard in my classroom while two students discuss martial arts: "That's not karate! That's haiku!" hahahahaha....

End of the day...

Let's top off our day with a six year old mouthing off with the "SH" word while picking a toy from the prize box.

A few pictures...

2008-08-31T08:57:00.001-07:00

Well, my classroom is all set up and organized. I have my first week of lesson plans mostly completed, my year overviews are being worked on, and I finally have a few minutes where I'm going to post some pictures! Granted, this wouldn't be happening this morning if I didn't have a staff meeting in an hour which I don't want to get ready for!

So, starting with the most miraculous transformations...from this
to this...

and that...

to that!

A few more pictures for your enjoyment...if you want to see more you can check my facebook page. Those pictures come complete with snarky comments!

Well...

2008-08-23T18:35:00.000-07:00

Well...I think that it is safe to say that "tomorrow" was a little bit overly ambitious. It would also be safe to say that moving is not my favourite activity! Between cleaning up and setting up my classroom (not quite finished), writing up year overviews and units (nowhere near finished!), and taking care of exciting things such as insurance, telephone service, blah blah blah...there just isn't time to blog! Then, add in the Olympics...which manage to be interesting even when all that is on is basketball, and I'm just hooped (haha...I'm so punny that I crack myself up)!

I promise that there really will be some pictures and such in the near future. Watch for a "before and after" set of images from my classroom. Also, don't be surprised if you see some apartment/Port Hardy pics!

I'm here!

2008-08-16T18:38:00.001-07:00

Well, I made it! I'm in Port Hardy (with my parents, who will leave tomorrow morning), mostly unpacked and organized, and happy with my apartment! Tomorrow I'll post some pictures of the apartment.

Down to the Wire...

2008-08-13T14:04:00.000-07:00

The big move is getting closer! 2.5 hours from now I will have bought school supplies at Staples (for all of my students), and 3 hours from now we will have picked up the rental truck! Hopefully not too many hours after that the truck will be loaded up. Ack! This moving thing is becoming a reality! Look for more updates in the next day or two...

The Next Great Adventure

2008-08-05T00:37:00.000-07:00

One of my favourite books in the entire world is Louisa May Alcott's "Little Women"...it's such a classic story, full of all the good things I look for in a book. Each time I read it I find something new that I hadn't thought about before, or that I had somehow missed. As I get older I start to look at the characters in different ways, and this is exciting too. I love the section of chapter 13 where Jo March asks her sisters "Wouldn't it be fun if all the castles in the air which we make could come true and we could live in them?" She is talking about dreams. We build up these dreams and goals for ourselves, many of which are so clearly out of reach, but fun to think about. Others are entirely attainable. Castles in the Air do not have to be impossible to reach!

One of my big castles is becoming a reality. I have my first real honest-to-goodness-actually-making-money teaching job! Not only that, but I am fortunate enough to be teaching grades one and two, which is my favourite group. I will be in Port Hardy, on Vancouver Island in British Columbia, working with people I like in a system with which I am familiar.

A few years ago, upon returning home from teaching Kindergarten in Saipan, CNMI, I was heard to say that I would NEVER live on an island again. It was too nerve-wracking and confining. I'd like to amend that statement now! I don't know that I could handle another teeny tiny island, but this is entirely different. Call it my prerogative to change my mind, call it a change in priorities, call it whatever you'd like, but I'm off to another island.

I look forward to sharing my adventures...and misadventures...with you!